everyone fears the future. i can't deny it too. what i fear about the future is whether feelings with me and my friends now will still remain this close. even though we'll still remember each other, i still different. remembering the feeling of closeness with them and still feeling it is DIFFERENT.

example1 : my primary school classmates

i had quite a few close friends among my primary school classmates. i was still calling them, chatting with them online during sec one. then, when i had a commitment to CO so i didn't turn to any class gatherings AT ALL. and then they kind of stopped calling me. :/ when i see them, i feel awkward. it's not the same anymore.

example2: seniors

used to be real close to my seniors. thought as long as we keep in touch, it'll still be the same. in the end, when i see them nowadays, i don't really know what to talk about with them. we used to be really noisy. talking non-stop until we went on separate ways. but now, there would probably be long awkward pauses in our conversations. sigh. again, not the same anymore.

see? that's what i really fear. now that we're all really going to separate again, it saddens me. really much. although we keep on saying, "it's okay, we'll remember each other." who are we kidding? so much facts placed right in front of me. maybe it's a different situation for others. but for me, it's like this.

i really hope the outings will work. i mean as in, all of us will really turn up, because i would try my best de! if it's not school work or impt family matters, i will turn up de. ((: